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Today I took Arlo to Forest Park and I was reading and he was digging a hole.  It was fun, except I almost fell asleep reading my book... so we left, because I thought it dangerous to fall asleep in the park.

I have decided to stop reading this book (Kaleidoscope) because I get super sleepy every time I start reading it. So I'm just done. and I've had it for a week and I'm only on page 74.  Clearly this book doesn't capture my interests very well. 

I had a silly week day off this week because I'm working this weekend.  Boo for working weekends.  I want a job with a desk and a rolly chair that makes more money and doesn't have to work weekends. One must have experience (and advanced degrees) to get one of those jobs.  Thus I work in the hospital and then will go to school and one day I will have my chair and desks and free weekends. 

I am going to start writing my statement of purpose for graduate school applications. That's always a fun process.  I really need to sit for a while and figure out exactly what my purpose is. 

Components:

Mental Health Reform

Psychosocial Rehabilitation

De-stigmatization 

Helping people

Teaching people

Learning

I just don't really know how to say WHY I want to do these things and THAT is what I need to figure out.  Right now I just feel so tired. But I'm going to get to work.

Until Later.

I almost forgot I had a blog.

So, it's that time of year when I start applying to Graduate Schools again.  I honestly hate grad school shopping. I have recently gotten a job and apartment in St. Louis, so I'm looking for places around here.  I'm taking suggestions and recommendations, specifically for an MA in Clinical Psychology. Here is my list so far:

SIU-E

Murray (I know thats not close and would require a move to Kentucky)

and (maybe) SLU if they offer a lone masters degree...hopefully they will email me back about that. 

I thought for a little while that I would just go to nursing school, which may still happen if I don't get into grad school again. But I'm realizing that I would prefer to not work (ultimately and forever) in a Psychiatric hospital setting.  I want to help people, like really help them ...people who want to be helped and help themselves. I want to be in Outpatient PSR. 

**If I get one comment about being a Social Work major, I will kick your ass**

So my job:

I am a Psychiatric Therapist....which is a Psych Tech....which means I work on a Psych Unit at a hospital where I watch people with serious Mental illnesses and keep them from hurting themselves or others.  I have interesting stories and I've only been on the unit for three weeks.  I've seen lots of people who have really needed to be there...and some who really DID'T need to be there. The ones who didn't need to be there are the ones I feel the most sorry for.  Imagine if you were on a locked unit with a bunch of people who are responding to internal stimuli and experiencing delusions of nuclear attacks on Carbondale...and you were sane...but the doctor tells you you have to stay there. They get kind of angry.

So far, one of my patients tried to strangle another patient, a guy had a seizure like experience (the nurse swears it wasn't a seizure) because the nurse wouldn't do anything about his chest pains, a man shouted at me because he thought he lost his refrigerator (which he didn't really have), one of our patients was an accused rapist of young girls (3 specifically) and one apparently, was recently released from prison for murder. Everyday is an adventure...let me tell ya. 

Apartment is good, dog is good. Dog has been barking a lot lately.  The other night there was a cat outside the window and he was just going crazy.  And I was trying to sleep it was like 3 am and I had to get up at 5. 

This American Life

Dear Everyone Who Reads This:

I am officially back. I've been back for like 3 weeks now maybe. It honestly feels like I never left. I don't know if that is a good thing or a bad thing, but whatever. I have been able to see many friends and many more visits are to happen soon. Hilary and Michelle tomorrow! SO EXCITING! Apparently we are going to a windmill for brunch. And then Nashville next week! Nashville friends, let's hang.

Since I have been back I have been doing many things, but at the same time doing nothing. I feel a little restless. I did not get in to graduate school this year, so that is sad, but really it just means I need to readjust the plan a little. I'm wanting to move to St. Louis. I'm excited to have a real space of my own. Japan just doesn't really count, cause I always new that it wasn't really mine. Ya know? But anyway, in order to move to St. Louis one has to find an apartment that is both available and not in the less fortunate part of town (I am trying to be politically correct, am I doing it?) And perhaps more importantly....a job. I have applied for a few, and I am waiting to hear back. However I did this before my lovely friend Kristen reviewed my Resume and made some fabulous changes.... so we'll see what happens.

I have also recently decided to go to RLC to take a CNA course. It's a free 8 week class and there are always a ton of jobs in the nursing field. So I figure it can only help and who knows. I may end up loving nursing. We'll see. My primary goal here is to get involved in the Behavioral Health field however possible. If that means starting out as a CNA in a hospital that has a Behavioral Health department, then that's what I'll do. I'm pretty excited about it.

Anyway, that's what I've been doing lately.

Oh and I've been painting my room at home. For those of you who have been to my house, I am not painting the jungle room. My mother is actually making me move to another room just so she can keep the jungle. Ridiculous I know. So I am now back to my very first room in this house. I have lived in every bedroom here except my parent's room of course.

2 weeks

I'm coming home in two weeks. there are some new pictures up on my flickr page. I haven't really organized them yet, but you can see them and they are labled. I'm going to write more later but it's late and i need to sleep. work tomorrow!

www.flickr.com/mollybeth7

3 weeks

Danielle's blogging inspired me to update. Though she is my only follower.

Right now I'm cold. I've been packing all day. And I've packed everything except stuff that I need this week. I moving out next Saturday. It's so weird. I always hate the last week of things, but I get a little nervous about doing everything, so I just want it to be over. But I don't like wishing to be leaving Japan. I've been telling my students that I am leaving. That is sad. I think I will cry alot during my last week. Ew, I don't want to think about it.

My friend Yuka asked me last night what I will be doing when I get home. She said to choose 10 things here they are in no specific order. Also spending time with family goes without saying so it's not on the list (Katie, Danielle, Amy. you are family.)

1. Jerry's Bigger Jigger- PRIME RIB, i miss and love you.
2.Subterranean Books
3. Watch French movies
4. Italian food on the Hill
5. Learn Spanish
6. Research Spanish Speaking countries
7. Go to school/get a job
8. Talk to people on the street, in the bookstore, at starbucks, in the supermarket.
9. order coffee with soy milk and be able to say that i want it without stuttering and stumbling and worrying that i'm saying the wrong word.
10. Go to Nashville and Portland

So that's that. If there is something I should do that I didn't list let me know what that is.

Ok goodbye

I'm coming home 5 weeks...

and my mom, grandma and aunts will be here in 4 weeks!! I'm soooo excited that they are coming here and I get to show them everything! It's going to be so awesome.

I am so full. I just ate a second bowl of veggie soup...because I'm addicted to it. Its just so yummy. Last night I had a Charlie and the Chocolate Factory themed party. I cut out candies and decorated my apartment (in fact there is still a construction paper lolly pop next to my front door, that probably looks funny) and had so much candy here and my friends came over and dressed up. I was Willy Wonka of course. Dani was charlie. she did a great job looking like a poor child.Emily was Violet... she wore blue and chewed gum. The others chose not to participate, but I treated them like characters anyway. Miyachi (new friend from my hair salon) was the oompa loompa, he even did the dance for us. I wish I would have had my camera ready to record that moment, but...I failed. It was amazing. This morn...afternoon, I woke up craving veggies like none other, so I went to the supermarket and literally spent 20 dollars only on veggies. Wonderful.

I took some pictures of my students. I'll get those up sometime soon.
Ryo, or as I like to call him, Satan, licked my hand the other day in class because I was taking the cards away. LICKED my hand. isn't that gross. then he proceeded to eat his eraser and a sticker. SICK.

I can't believe I'm coming home next month. I will be able to drive again.... and see my friends and family. and eat at Jerry's. BWAHHH! its going to be great.

I think i was going to write about something important or sentimental, but I have forgotten. Oh well!